Human waste

I am such an idiot. For so long, after so many revolutions around Sol, I have disillusioned myself in dizziness mind body and soul. I can no longer allow History dictate my present and control my future. I was not born to follow someone's calendar of repeating events. This Life is a Lie. What do I do now with my new found wisdom which is so common to everyone but simply ignored or refused to be acknowledged? I would bend down on my knees to pray, but the people whom I need to hear me are too busy already on theirs worshiping beings that do not exist. I feel like a prisoner, a slave and a fool. The land has somehow stolen my allegiance from the beings of Earth and I am ashamed. I am appalled. And I am terrorized not just by the Universe but my very own species in this brainwash. We never had a chance. I want to cry and find the arms of lovely women to lose myself in. Make me forget, but I dare not spread another seed of destruction in this Hell we perpetrate upon each other. We behave like demon beasts only born to compete and trade instead of cooperate and share, we live to possess, and we judge each other to death. I can not bear to be a part. No, I am not surrounded by Angels granting me sanity on what could be Heaven in this glorious Universe. I will never know freedom, peace, nor prosperity amongst such cruel and evil beings as you. My breath is wasted, and I wait for nature to consume me. I have been dishonored by being turned into a pimp and prostitute, participant in extorting our gifts from one another. I am evil and we share no common good because we refuse to pull our dependence from our greatest roots of evil. Currency must not exist between people actually caring for each other, instead we have been bread to hate each other and why this world has yet to know people peaceful enough to call it home to truly bring logic and safety to all their children. I now laugh at those whom fail to realize we prevent World Peace. Chaos and death is our collective will and we deserve our punishment for ignoring the present and our responsibility to Life for the Human race gifted this short moment in space. What a waste.